33 Hundred Words of True Detective Nerd Rage

Right now, as I’m typing this, it’s 10:30 PM, Sunday, August 9th. I don’t care if I stay up all night to finish this essay, I’m refusing to let myself go to sleep until it’s done. I want to hold on to how triggered I am right now. I know this sounds like a lot of nerd rage, and because I think a lot of it is nerd rage. I’m getting angry over a the season finale of a TV show. It’s incredibly childish and asinine of me. But I’m an emotionally stunted 21 year old autiste, so bear with me here.


See, as jaded and cynical as I am in this era of Jack and Jill, a part of me still sees film as art. For every half-assed, cash-grab Hollywood shitfest like Hunger Games Part 3.5, Terminator Geneysis/Genysys/What-The-Fuck-Ever and The Fantastic Four, there’s still going to be stuff like Drive and John Wick that actually are emotionally compelling or aesthetically and technically brilliant. We all know that Hollywood is a part of The Cathedral or The Synagogue or ZOG or whatever you want to call the general media-academic-political complex that drives mainstream public discourse. We know that most movies are going to have some form of shitty, anti-social message to it that wages war on common morality. TV is no exception, and sometimes even worse. I barely watch TV at all, I almost never see anything with artistry and actual love like Twin Peaks.

But True Detective was a break from all of that. For me, at least, it was a breath of fresh air. The first season was so remarkably excellent and pro-social. For those of you who don’t know, let me explain it. True Detective is an anthology series, each season is a different mystery with different characters. They’re short, only 8 episodes per season. Let me give you a summary of each season, and you’ll see why I’m mad. No spoiler warnings here: go back to tumblr, faggot.
Season one of True Detective is about the hunt for a serial killer in the swamps of Louisiana. It follows two detectives: Martin “Marty” Hart and Rustin “Rust” Cohle. Marty is your everyman small-town detective, mostly used to solving really petty crimes. He has his vices, mostly in the form of an adulterous relationship with a court stenographer, but he’s altogether a very grounded and sensible family man. Rust meanwhile, is a brooding, nihilist wreck of a man, scarred by traumatic undercover stints and the tragic loss of his wife and daughter. He’s a jaded cynic who sees humanity as pitiful and pathetic. He has no life outside of his work, which is a morbid obsession of his. He relies on constant substance abuse to cope with how mentally ruined he is.

The series starts with the bizarre ritual murder of prostitute Dora Lange in 1995. Marty and Rust begin looking for the killer, as well as a missing child named Marie Fontenot. Their investigation takes a turn for the weird and terrifying when they discover cryptic references to a “Yellow King” and a place called “Carcosa” in Lange’s diary. Marty goes berserk when he finds out that his mistress is dating another man, and in response she tells his wife about the affair, who then promptly leaves him. Ultimately they track down their prime suspect: meth head Reggie LeDoux, whole Marty promptly executes upon discovering the two kidnapped and abused children in his lab. Rust fakes a shootout to cover up the execution, and the two are hailed as heroes for rescuing the kids and taking out the killer. Marty reconciles with his wife, everything is good.

We then skip ahead to 2002. During a routine investigation, a prisoner makes reference to the “Yellow King” again and convinces Cohle that LeDoux was not the real killer, who is still out there, ready to strike again. Cohle does some independent investigation and discovers a large string of missing children connected to Reverend Jeremiah Tuttle’s Schools. He also discovers that there was rampant child molestation in the schools, (see, it’s not just the Catholics!) and that there was a third man abusing the kidnapped children at LeDoux’s compound. Tuttle complains to the police and Rust is suspended for refusing to halt his investigation. Meanwhile, struggling with his strained family life, Marty strikes up an affair with a girl he met during the 1995 investigation. When Marty’s wife discovers the affair, she goes out and sleeps with Cohle. When Cohle realizes that she was using him as a weapon, “bros before hoes” sets in and he tells her to never speak to him again. Marty’s wife tells him about her affair, and Marty and Cohle get into a fistfight at the police station. Cohle quits the police force for good, having seemingly lost the closest thing he had to a friend.

Finally, we come to 2012. The killer strikes again, and detectives Thomas Papania and Maynard Gilbough bring both Marty (whose wife has divorced him and is now a private investigator) and Rust (who nobody had seen in ten years) in for questioning. Papania and Gilbough both suspect that Rust is the killer, having clearly gone insane long before the Dora Lange case. They also insinuate that his paranoid delusions lead to him killing Reverend Tuttle two years prior. Marty vehemently denies this and walks out of his interview when the suggestion is made. The two detectives meet and reconcile. Rust reveals that he spent the ten years he was “missing” out investigating the missing children. Two years ago, he broke into one of Reverend Tuttle’s houses looking for clues. He discovers a video tape where Marie Fontenot is surrounded by a group of masked figures before presumably being raped and killed. Rust infers that the people on the tape killed Tuttle before he could be blackmailed into confession. From there, Rust discovers a secret cult presumably dedicated to the “The Yellow King” that’s responsible for dozens of missing women and children, and has members in incredibly high positions in Louisiana and even the US Senate. Marty is initially hesitant to believe Rust until he sees what’s on the tape. The two resolve to finish the job once and for all.

The true killer is revealed to be Errol Childress, an inbred, deformed landscaper who bangs his sister and keeps the decaying corpse of his father William in his shed. Marty and Rust track Childress down to his run-down house, where he flees into a labyrinth of trees and tunnels which he refers to as “Carcosa.” They confront and kill Childress, who injures both of them in a final struggle. Later, in the hospital, Rust admits that being able to stop Childress has helped him find some peace in the world, and that his and Marty’s friendship has convinced him that there is some good in humanity after all.

So that’s season one. I actually feel a lot less angry now that I’ve given a synopsis of it. I guess it was inevitable that the Eye of Schlomo would turn towards True Detective, given how non-kosher it was. Even a child-raping Jerry Falwell knockoff doesn’t make up for its sins against dildolech. The entire story is centered around male heterosexual bonding. Rust and Cohle are shown to be a strong, solid force for good who overcome their flaws and vices to defeat an unspeakable evil. Marty’s wife is a huge cunt who is presented to be incredibly bitchy and emotional. Both Papani and Gilbough are black, and also incredibly incompetent. Aside from them the only other black characters are some ghetto dindus who Cohle gets in a gunfight with and an elderly former maid of the Tuttles. Hell, since this is a post-Rotherham world, the fact that two white men want to protect children from being brutally sodomized and killed probably isn’t okay. It was a remarkably pro-social story of good men overcoming and vanquishing clear evil, all while finding hope and goodness in a seemingly empty and miserable world.

So now we get season two, a clusterfuck of epic proportions with a good ol’ dildo right up the ass. Season two takes mostly place in Southern California in 2015. While season one is centered around two detectives, season two follows three detectives and a mobster. Ray Velcoro is a Vinci city detective and part-time enforcer for local mob boss Frank Semyon. Some years back, Velcoro’s wife was brutally raped. Semyon reached out to Velcoro with the identity of the rapist, who Velcoro murdered beginning his fall into corruption. However, his marriage falls apart and Velcoro is desperately fighting for custody of his son Chad, whose birth after his mother’s rape leaves his paternity unknown. Frank Semyon is having issues with his wife because she can’t have children. Antigone “Ani” Bezzerides is an aggressive deputy in the country sheriff’s office with a fixation on knife-fighting and a dysfunctional family situation with her libertine sister and hippie father. Paul Woodrough is a former mercenary and current highway patrol officer suspended after a rich actress (who totally isn’t Lindsay Lohan, all resemblances are a complete coincidence) he pulls over alleges that he let her go in exchange for a blowjob. He’s an incredibly closeted gay and also prone to irrational, risk-seeking behavior. So yeah, you’ve got your two straight white men, but now there’s a STRONK INDEPENDENT WOMYN and a token gay. Isn’t diversity great?

When Vinci city manager Ben Caspere is found tortured and murdered by Woodrough, him, Ani and Ray are all assigned to the investigation. Caspere was a prime target in a state investigation into Vinci’s corruption, hence the special multi-jurisdiction task force. Since he was also involved in a massive railway deal with Frank Semyon, Frank also wants to find the killer and uses Ray as his inside man on the investigations. Ray follows a trail of clues to Caspere’s secret house, where he is shot by a mysterious man with a crow mask with rubber bullets.

A lot of personal bullshit and melodrama happens where Woodrough tries to live in denial about his sexuality, instead trying to focus on his relationship with his ambiguously brown girlfriend Emily. Ray’s battle with his wife for custody gets even worse, and he starts to break down when she chooses to get a paternity test for Chad. Frank and his wife fight over the fact that she can’t have babies while what little business he has left is slowly taken over by a bunch of mexicans and a “COMMIE JEW FUCK” (that’s where Seventh Son got the drop from) named Ossip. Ani does jack shit. It’s revealed that Caspere attended semi-standard fuckparties (they banged whores, no gay shit) with the rest of California’s rich and powerful. Some clues lead to the police performing a raid on mexican pimp Ledo Amarilla, but the raid goes wrong and everyone but Woodrough, Ani and Ray is killed in a retarded shootout that made me feel like I was watching DarkSydePhil’s playthrough of XCOM all over again.

Two months after the shootout, it’s decided that Amarilla killed Caspere. Ray quits to be a security guard at Frank’s casino, Ani is suspended after one of her subordinates that she was banging tattles on her, and Woodrough gets Emily pregnant and offers to marry her despite also hooking up with an old flame from his mercenary days, another ambiguously Hispanic gay guy. Frank’s empire is reduced to almost nothing, and he suspects that his subordinate Blake is making cash on the side working for someone else. Not convinced that Amarilla killed Caspere, strong independent black woman Katharine Davis of the DA’s office re-opens the investigation secretly and assigns the three survivors of the shootout to it. It’s revealed that the man Ray killed all those years back didn’t rape his wife when the real rapist is caught elsewhere. Ray flips his shit and goes to confront Frank, who assures him that he didn’t know, and was fed bad information by someone else. Woodrough discovers that the diamonds stolen from Caspere upon his murder were originally from a jewelry store that was robbed during the LA riots. The owners of the store were executed by the robbers, while their two children watched from hiding. Ani goes undercover at one of these semi-standard fuckparties and suddenly remembers that she was kidnapped and raped as a child at her Dad’s commune. Woodrough and Ray steal the papers that confirm a massive land deal of questionable legality. Woodrough also discovers that the current Vinci chief Holloway and his Lieutenant Burris were the ones who robbed the jewelery store back when they were both LAPD, with Caspere as their supervisor covering it up.

It’s revealed that Woodrough’s old flame got back in touch with him so Holloway can blackmail him into handing over the documents as well as Velcoro and Ani’s hideout (both have been framed for murder- Ani killing a man at the fuckparty and Ray killing Davis). Woodrough escapes only to get shot in the back and killed by  Burris. Frank discovers that Blake is helping organize the fuckparties behind his back, as well as helping Ossip take over Frank’s business. It’s also revealed that Blake was the one who lied about Ray’s wife’s rapist to Frank so that Ray would just kill on a meth head Blake owed money to. Frank torches his business and spends his last few dollars on a shit-ton of weaponry and one-way tickets to Venezuela for him and wife. Ray realizes that Chad doesn’t even like being around him and concedes custody of Chad to his wife on the grounds that she never tells him the results of her paternity test. Ani magically reconciles with her father and sister before randomly falling  in love with Ray.

Ray and Ani discover that Caspere’s secretary was one of the orphans from the jewelry store robbery. They go to her house to find her chained to the bed. She reveals that her older brother, the man in the Crow Mask, went berserk when he discovered that Caspere had slept with her and was plotting to meet Holloway and Burris at a train station with a hard drive full of blackmail material in hopes that he could kill both of them. Ray chases the brother to the train station. He improvises a plan to force a confession out of Holloway, but when he mentions how Caspere was the sister’s real father and the mother he had killed was pregnant with a third, the brother goes berserk yet again and attacks Holloway and the two are killed by police. Ray escapes and meets up with Frank, who recruits Ray for a raid where the two kill Ossip and all of his men and steal their money. The two split the money and part ways. Frank is kidnapped by Mexicans who take him out to the desert where they initially intend to kill him before he hands over all of his share of the cash. However, a fight breaks out and Frank is mortally wounded. He wanders the desert and makes it an impressive distance before he bleeds out and dies. Meanwhile Ray stops to visit his son one last time before he escapes. However in doing so, Burris finds him and plants a tracking device on his car. Ray leads Burris away from Ani and is gunned down by him and an armed contingent of cops. Ani escapes with all the evidence to Venezuela, where she tells the whole story and leaves the evidence to a random journalist before leaving to continue her escape. Meanwhile the conspiracy effectively succeeds: the railroad is made, Burris becomes the new chief of police in Vinci, Ray is remembered as a psychotic vigilante while Woodrough gets a memorial highway. Ray’s wife gets the test results and discovers that he was Chad’s father after all.

So yeah, let’s compare the two seasons, shall we? Season one is a story where good overcomes evil, and the heroes defeat both their own demons as well as the very real ones. There’s a solid ending in the hospital where the two men sum up their journey proudly and proceed with a happy, fulfilled existence. You’re left with a feeling of hope, joy, and overall satisfaction. Meanwhile season two ends on a major down note. Three out of the four major characters are dead, each having died alone and miserable. Ani is alive, but will have to spend the rest of her days on the run. The bad guys have won, and at this point it’s likely that not even the truth will defeat them. You feel totally empty and powerless, like there’s no chance that evil can be defeated. It’s a feeling of total despair and misery. Nothing was accomplished- the brother never avenged the death of his parents, Woodrough and Ray never truly got to live a happy life, Frank never realized his ambitions, and Ani will likely never get any closure for all the drama she went through. What was the point of the story? It’s just a swirling void of emptyness. It’s almost like it was specifically designed to say “not so fast, goy!” to the people who felt inspired and uplifted by season one.

I don’t know what else there is to say right now. It’s 1:00 in the morning. Season one of True Detective was great art- it moved me in a positive, uplifting way and even enriched my life a little bit. Season two of True Detective is degenerate art- it made me feel miserable and empty at first, then enraged that it dare made me feel that way. It’s not even a tragedy- a good tragedy makes it clear that the miserable ending is inevitable and that there’s a sort of warning or moral for the audience. There is no moral for season two. Ray and Frank straighten out their lives and start to turn things around and still meet undignified ends BECAUSE of that. Indeed, if there is a moral it’s “Don’t ever try to redeem yourself, it’s not worth it. Just keep on being a huge scumbag and you’ll get away clean.”

It’s 1:30 AM. I spent the last 15 minutes or so staring at that moral. It’s so bleak, so hollow. I feel like True Detective was raped, stripped of the light in her eyes and left a soulless husk. I’m a pretty cynical guy, I think all of us on the far-right are. But I have a lot of hope for the world, hope that in the end, human goodness will win out and we’ll learn to make the world a better place. And nothing triggers me harder than something innocent getting destroyed. When that hitchiking robot got smashed up by some Philly dindus, I felt embarrassed to identify with that city for the first time in years. It was a grand project in human goodwill, and it was totally destroyed by savages. I feel the same way now. True Detective was a show with heroes, now it’s a show with nothing.

It’s 2:00. I’m arguing with some idiot on reddit who thinks blacks care about their constitutional rights and illegals love the constitution. I’m arguing with another who thinks that Singapore’s success came from its economic policies alone and had nothing to do with its authoritarian policing system. I got banned from /r/conservative for being a “racist fuck” even though I didn’t say anything racist there. I’m also arguing with some defeatist dumbass in the TRS comments. It’s a nice way of avoiding how I don’t have any solid conclusion to this article. There’s no solid, satisfying conclusion here just like season two didn’t have one. Fuck season two. I’m going to keep fighting the good fight because I want to help save the world. Fuck despair. I choose hope.

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6 thoughts on “33 Hundred Words of True Detective Nerd Rage

      • I haven’t seen season 2 but I’ve heard nothing but shit. I’d like to think that Nick Pizzoloto was informed by you know who that they were going to dildo up the series no matter what he wanted; so he decided to hand them shit on a plate. Perhaps out of spite, perhaps out of a strategic ‘fuck off.’ Maybe now they’ll leave him alone to write season 3 the way he wants.

        Like

  1. Thanks. Now i know not to both with season 2.

    I got banned from /r/republican for saying ‘cuckservative’ in a long comment discussing why my parent (top) commenter should not have said “mostly white, mostly male, mostly old” as a response to an image of a Trump rally

    Like

  2. Ok, I’ll take the contrary position.

    I enjoyed season 2 and thought it was very much in line with the alt right.

    1) The corrupt land deal was around federal contracting and the high speed rail. No one expects it to actually get built but people get rich through connections. When some prog says “we need to invest in infrastructure” here’s a nice clear translation to “we need to enrich gangsters”.
    2) What happens on the hippie commune? It’s not some idealistic wonderful place – it’s a cesspool. All the guys who run the human trafficking ring meet there. Ani is raped by some hippie looking guy who was all hippie progressivism as a cover for being a sexual predator. How does he lure her? He tells her she’s pretty which is something she’s thrilled to hear because she’s a girl – human nature shining through prog bullshit about men and women being the same.
    3) Woodrough has some same sex attraction but he actually tries not to give in to it. This isn’t portrayed as a “betrayal of his true self” or anything like that – it’s portrayed as being natural and healthy. The guy is ashamed of his tendencies and tries to control them.
    4) Open borders isn’t exactly portrayed in a positive light. At the top end sociopathic criminal Jews. At the bottom end, Mexican criminal gangs. Even the non-criminal aliens are shown as a blight.
    5) Frank’s wife is sterile from abortion and dying to have kids.
    6) Random street crime is horrific and shown that way (even if later it turns out it wasn’t random crime). When the cop who investigated the jewelery store robbery described the horror that the children went through and how their lives were shattered afterward it was a powerful reminder of something that progressives want you to forget – crime really does ruin innocent people’s lives. Progs want you to forget about that an concentrate on how bad it is that the law has to be enforced on black people. (Yes, it turns out that it wasn’t random street crime but targeted – doesn’t change the emotional impact).

    Liked by 1 person

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