Anger, Decorum, and the Pursuit of Truth

Let’s not mince words: last night, I was triggered. It’s not really my place to get angry on a personal level. It’s unbecoming of me as a reactionary, and dare I say, Anissimov-esque. I said last night that I believe in decorum, and I mean it. I think neoreaction as a movement should aspire to a higher level of behavior and decency. That doesn’t mean we can’t cut loose and have fun: Nick B. Steves can still go on the Daily Shoah and call people fags, I can still run TRD, Duck can be Duck. But if we are to be better than the modern world, we must ultimately hold ourselves to a higher standard of behavior than the modern world, primarily in our own spaces. It’s one thing to express moral indignation at a leftist pedophile. It’s another to publicly coax someone to suicide on a semi-intellectual blog. If I cannot exhibit a sense of restraint and formality in my own domain, then what good am I as a moral authority?

Anger is good. I’m not upset that I got angry. I’m actually proud of myself for getting angry. My anger comes from having a sense of right from wrong. I’m angry because I see a bad person doing bad things and barely anyone else being willing to step up and say “no, this is bad, you’re bad and need to be stopped.” My anger comes from my sanity.

I’m upset because I didn’t properly harness my anger. Letting my anger consume me and override my sense of decorum is not healthy. As reactionaries, we must remember that we are subservient to morality, a good much greater than us. As healthy as anger is, it’s petty and personal. Letting this anger override a commitment to public standards of behavior is inherently selfish. No one man is greater than the principles and values of neoreaction. Not Moldbug, not Nick B. Steves, and certainly not me.

This is not an apology. I have no one to apologize to. I have not hurt anyone but myself- through petty anger, I dishonored myself. This is an explanation, an honest reflection on my words and actions, and what they mean. I believe that honesty is the greatest moral good, and that Neoreaction is the fundamental pursuit of truth and a truth-based society. Thus, I must confront the truth of my own actions, and be honest about what I have done and what it means.

Thus, I submit this not as a submissive public confession, but a bold declaration. I will say with authority that I have done wrong to myself. This is the truth of the matter. I am not ashamed to say I have erred, and I will not dwell on it. I will not delete or hide my error, but leave it there for the world to see. I am not ashamed of my mistakes, I will only grow from them. I will move forward in pursuit of the truth and all that is good. I will grow and learn to harness my anger. I will not deny my faults, but work to overcome them.

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I Have no Sympy for “Sarah” Nyberg

So some big things have been going down recently. A rabid tranny SJW by the name of Nicky “Sarah” Nyberg who opposed #GamerGate was recently ousted as a pedophile (ignore the WN stuff, no one gives a fuck about that) and suddenly all the big SJWs on twitter are scrambling to cover for him. Recently, he posted some really dumb rant on medium where he tries to insist that none of what he did or said was really his fault and it comes down to how awful internet edgelord culture is and how he’s the victim despite showing naked pictures of his pre-pubesecent cousin to his friends online.

Nyberg’s entire rant centers around how miserable he is that his posting career has caught up to him. Admittedly, that’s a minor concern of mine too. Tomorrow, I go into an Unnamed Postal Service for a job interview. But even if I know for a fact that I’m safe, the familiar anxiety haunts me that someone will tell the HR rep that I’m an evil white nationalist reactionary who makes mean and edgy jokes online and that’s a chance at good money down the toilet. So realistically, I should feel sympathy for “Sarah” Nyberg, right?

Wrong.

See, I found out via their forums that I might be able to get a position as editor for TheRightStuff.biz. Nothing’s confirmed yet, but the idea of me being an editor for a site that regularly gets thousands of hits per day is overwhelming. I’m still in shock and disbelief that they’d even want my written work on their site. But at the same time, I’m incredibly proud that I’m being recognized for putting in effort to help build and organize a community and a movement. If it was any other website, I’d be putting this on my resume. But I can’t. Hell, I can’t even use my real name when publishing stuff for TRS. The only reason I do so here is because I know it’s obscure enough to keep people from finding it when they google my name. I have to lurk amongst the shadows, and it’s because of “people” (I use that term loosely) like Nyberg.

Nyberg and anti-#GamerGate have spent their entire existence trying to make sure that anyone who publicly speaks up against feminism, racial egalitarianism, and the rest of the dildo that’s getting shoved up western civilization’s ass is quickly rendered unemployable and impossible to socialize with. Make no mistake about it, they want us exiled, if not dead. I’ll confess, I’ve been suicidal before: nothing snaps you out of it like realizing that most people will cheer for your suicide while only your family will mourn you. And given my sister’s reaction to when I casually dropped the N-bomb in the middle of a conversation, I doubt it would even be my entire family.

That’s how cancerous leftism is- it makes you revel in the destruction of good men and women who stand up for what they believe in, people who want to secure a future for their children instead of letting them be raped. It forces you to hide away while mentally disturbed pedophiles are celebrated and cheered on. It’s an evil ideology espoused by evil people. Heroes like Chuck C. Johnson are forced off of twitter while subhumans like Deray McKesson are given invites to Yale.

So no, I don’t feel sorry at all about Nyberg’s past catching up to him. Right now, he’s a victim of the society that he built. No, not teenage edgelording, but rabid callout-culture leftism. I’ve been banned from twitter more times than I can count, and I know Nyberg was responsible for at least one of those bans. I know he also associated with the scumbag who called my parents to try and threaten me, and also pushed for one of my idols to be deported. He is, both directly and indirectly, responsible for one of the biggest obstacles in my struggle to carve out an independent living. He’s part of the reason why I can’t call up all my family and friends and tell them about my possible editorial gig even though I desperately want to. He’s a vile creature, a subhuman piece of filth who celebrates in the destruction of all that is good and pure. Him and people like him will gleefully admit to making life difficult to people like me, and lament that there are consequences to their actions.

So no, I have no sympy for Nicky. None whatsoever. And Nicky, if you’re reading this, I suggest you do what I told you to months ago: go deep-throat a 12-gauge. You contribute nothing positive to this world or the people who live in it. We would all be better off without you. You are a sick and twisted degenerate who only exists to hurt perfectly good people. Fuck off and die, scum.

A followup: Some people have taken issue with that last paragraph. Fine, whatever, it’s edgy, I’ll admit. I had some reservations about posting it because even I believe in decorum. But at the same time, I honestly do want Nicky to kill himself. For those of you who think I’m being extreme, I want you to put yourself in my shoes: imagine that the one part of your life that you’re proud of above all else, the one thing that you legitimately light up when you think about, is also one of if not the most hated and despised things in modern western society. Imagine trying to hide such a major part of your life from your friends, your family, and even your own partner (yes, the irony of being openly gay but closeted alt-right is not lost on me). Imagine the consistent fear of being discovered and losing everything, with no backup net. Imagine the pain from your own father telling you that he was “disappointed” in you chasing your dreams and doing what you loved, when he was the one to tell you to do just that.

Understand where I’m coming from before lashing out at me. Understand the double life that I have to live just so I can have any life at all. Understand the continuous daily turmoil I have to face. Understand the looming threat that no matter how hard I try to protect myself, my entire life could be shattered in an instant by some hook-nosed vermin at the SPLC or ADL. I’m only 21. I have a bright future ahead of me, but it could be destroyed in an instant thanks to scum like Nyberg and the environment that they’ve created. So yes, I’m angry, hateful, and bitter. But I think in this case, I’m right to be. I’ve done nothing wrong, but I’m still the villain. Meanwhile a tranny child predator is now seen as the “hero”. If I didn’t get angry, I’d be insane.

And just when I think I’m done, people on NeoGAF are illustrating my point perfectly: “Out any Gater and report their status to their families, their bosses, their teachers.” Fuck these cancerous little shits. I would love nothing more than to hear them scream as I throw them out of a helicopter. Is that edgy? Maybe, but can you blame me at this point?